Are We Ready For This?!

Throughout the past week I've been on this crazy emotional rollercoaster where I fling myself from absolutely elated to absolutely terrified. We are so excited to meet Thomas and we are praying that all will go well, that Thomas will like us and want to be a part of our family, that the visits will be positive and won't be horribly difficult for Thomas, etc, etc. There is so much that goes through your mind as you wait. I've read other women, on other blogs, panic and stress and worry their hearts out as they wait for thier child. I don't know how some of them were able to wait months after a referral to meet the ones they've been waiting their whole lives for. I can't focus on anything other than Thomas. I want to see him and touch him and make sure he is alright. I want to be the best mother in the world for him. I want him to be able to grow into a place where he actually feels like I am his mother. I am so worried about so many things. How can I parent a 10 year old when I haven't ever parented before? How will I know what he needs and wants? How will I be able to guide him and raise him to be the man God wants him to be? How much will he eat? Does he sleep okay? Does he like hugs? Does he want a mom? Will he ever feel like my son? The list goes on and on of all the things running through my head. I don't want to hurt him or let anyone else hurt him. I don't want him to feel pain and disappointment. I know these things are inevitable and I know they are a crucial part of him becoming a man, but I want to shield him anyway.

I know that God has brought Thomas into our lives. I pray that Thomas will choose us and will want to be a permanant part of our family, a Winzer forever. I know that God will give me the strength and the grace to parent a 10 year old boy. None of that changes how worried I am about him and about his life and his future and his hopes and dreams and self esteem. I feel like there aren't enough parenting books in the world to help me know how to do the very best for Thomas. Even as I typed that last sentance, I could hear the Lord speaking, there is only one parenting book I need. There is only one way to guide Thomas through this life. The Word, Jesus Christ, Prayer, Faith.

I've decided that nothing about this parenting gig is going to be easy...

INTRODUCING...

THOMAS!!!! It is a bit of a long story but I wanted to let you all know that in just about ten days, we will meet our very first son! His name is Thomas and he is ten years old. The social worker who we worked with regarding the Dynamic Duo called us and said that they had just done a staffing on a kiddo that would be perfect for our home. He told us about him and we instantly felt like Thomas was an answer to our prayers. We have asked the Lord, night after night, to send the children that He has for us. Thomas's social worker told us that the one thing Thomas really wanted was a family that was involved in church. We aren't anything, if not involved in church!

We can't wait to meet our Thomas! We've told some people about him and we can't wait to be able to tell everyone about meeting him in just ten short days. I can't believe I'm going to be a mom! It really has been amazing how God has taken our journey through so many thoughts and options and has landed us at one place we'd never really thought of. We already feel so incredibly blessed to be given the gift of Thomas and his young life. We can't wait to meet him and learn all about him and share our lives with him. We will most certainly post pictures and let you all know how it goes.

We, first and foremost, want to thank God in prayer for His faithfulness and His grace and the blessing of Thomas. We'd also like to ask that you would continue to pray for a job for Nathan. He is going for his call back interview with Coca Cola tomorrow afternoon and we are praying that the Lord would open this door. We are hoping to have the blessing of homeschooling Thomas for at least his first year with us and we can't do that without a better position for Nathan. Pray for Thomas as this is going to be a big transition for him and we know that he will have to grieve his losses of everything and everyone he knows. Pray that he would feel loved and know that he is permanent here in our home. Pray for new friends for him as well. Pray for us, that we would be the parents Thomas deserves and that we would give him grace and give ourselves grace as we all adjust to one another. Pray that our first meeting goes really well and that Thomas feels positive about us.

Thank you all for your continued prayers and support! We love you!